Don't commit sins. The surest way not to sin

Denis Podorozhny answers:

Hello,

Sorry for not answering your question right away. It was too busy, so many letters from site visitors remained unanswered for a long time. Now, sitting at the airport, I take advantage of the window in time and answer them. To yours, I want to answer in sufficient detail so that my answer can serve many who find themselves in a similar situation.

There is a good expression: “He who gives up loses,” and the Scripture says: “...the righteous man falls seven times and gets up again...” (Proverbs 24:16). I think that the power of righteousness is revealed not in the fact that a person lives an error-free life, but in the fact that he always strives for holiness, and even if he has fallen, he does everything to rise.

The Apostle Paul wrote: “Brethren, I do not count myself to have attained; but only, forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press toward the goal for the honor of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. So, whoever is perfect among us should think like this; But if you think differently about anything, God will reveal this also to you” (Phil. 3:13-15).

If he did not consider himself to have achieved it, then even the most pious believer should be able to see heights that have not yet been reached in his life, and begin to strive for them.

Perfection, in Paul's words, is found not in infallibility, but in the relentless pursuit of moving forward toward the knowledge of God, without despair, without giving up, and without allowing ourselves to become soporific in self-satisfaction.

It would be worse for you if you were not ashamed of your behavior when you did wrong things. Having shame and understanding that you are wrong before God is already a good sign, but in no case should you stop there.

Both I and the majority of those who believed in Christ, when they came to the Lord, did not immediately break through in all areas of their lives. Sometimes you have to repent and repent for repeating your own stupidities or weaknesses. The ability to overcome areas in which we are especially weak sometimes comes easily, by God's grace, and sometimes - through the fact that, when it seems that nothing will change, one day, one becomes so disgusted with the mistakes made that, finally, strength appears resist them.

There are battles that are not easy for us, and the price we pay to win them makes victory especially valuable.

So what should you do to avoid “the same mistakes”? I will give you, and everyone who has a similar situation, some advice:

1) Admit your weakness in this area. You cannot overcome your sin on your own.

Some Christians think that if they say, “I am strong!” they will become strong. The truth is that while it is good to talk about strength, it is important not to forget that we are strong IN CHRIST, and without Him we can do nothing (John 15:5). Even when we read the Apostle Paul and try to apply his words to our lives, we need to correctly place the emphasis: “I can do all things through JESUS ​​CHRIST who strengthens me” (Phil. 4:13).

If I am so strong, then why strengthen me? Truly, victory over sin begins only when we admit our weakness. “Those who are healthy do not need a physician, but those who are sick...” (Luke 5:31), Jesus said. It is from the recognition of our own weakness, sinfulness and inability to deal with the problem and sin ourselves that we have a humble willingness to seek help from God, to pray, and, if necessary, to be ready to turn to church ministers for advice.

2) Call a spade a spade. Sin is not just a weakness or a character trait, it is lawlessness!

When we disguise our sins with beautiful words, like: “small problem”, “weakness of character”, “bad habit”, etc., then we have neither the desire nor the readiness to meaningfully and contritely repent of them. It is impossible to receive forgiveness of sins by calling them “mistakes” or “problems.”

See your wrongness as lawlessness, which is disgusting to God. We have the power to overcome sin if in our eyes the “problem” is recognized as real lawlessness.

Believe me, it is much easier to fight the enemies (read – sins) that we hate. Hate your sin!

3) Confess your sin and repent

Understanding that you are wrong before God is half the battle. There are many people around us who understand perfectly well that they are doing evil, but at the same time, they do not try one iota to change the situation. Silence is golden only when it is time to be silent. King David, who sinned, confessed: “When I was silent, my bones grew old because of my daily groaning, for day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; My freshness has disappeared, as in the summer drought” (Ps. 32:3,4)

The Lord gave us lips as gates for our inner man; they show what we are already filled with and influence what will enter our heart. By opening our mouths to admit that we are a sinner, we open our hearts to God's justification and sanctification.

That is why David, having seen the harmfulness of seclusion in his sin, admits: “But I revealed my sin to You and did not hide my iniquity; I said: “I confess my transgressions to the Lord, and You have taken away from me the guilt of my sin” (Ps. 31:5)

Do not suffer from sins and mistakes, open your heart to God, confessing them to Him, and He “being faithful and righteous, will forgive... sins... and cleanse... from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9)

4) Seek help from a church minister.

All sins are equally vile to God, but their seriousness, the level of influence on our or others' lives, and the consequences generated make them different. If, in an accidental small offense, it is enough for us to repent before God and apologize to the offended person, and we know that we will never do this again, then in areas of serious lawlessness, or deep dependence, or the deadlock of the situation, we can overcome ourselves alone very hard.

There are many areas where a person seeking a way out needs to confess sin not only before God, but also before His representative - God's servant. Many times I have been convinced that outside support, the willingness of a minister to listen to a person, timely advice, prayer or encouragement, gave greater results than months of solitary battles between a person and himself and his problems.

“Confess your faults to one another and pray for one another in order to be healed: the fervent prayer of the righteous can accomplish much,” the Apostle James wisely noted the relationship between unconfessed sin and illness (James 5:16), recommending that we not carry everything within ourselves.

On this issue, I will only give advice so that you do not rush to confess your sins to people who are unconfirmed, full of unbelief, gossips, or those who are themselves confused in their lives, otherwise, “if a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit” (Matthew .15:14).

5) Eliminate from your life all things that encourage or provoke this sin.

Believe me, it is not entirely reasonable to try to overcome addiction to alcohol and continue to go to drunken parties, maintaining relationships with drinking friends, or to try to overcome lust, but at the same time, watch dirty movies on cable television with one eye and “inadvertently” flirt anonymously on Internet sites dating, voluptuously looking at photographs of girls.

The psalmist said this about this: “I will not put before my eyes any obscene thing; I hate criminal deeds: they will not stick to me. A corrupt heart will be removed from me; I will not know evil. He who secretly slanderes his neighbor I will drive out; I will not tolerate someone who is proud in his eyes and proud in his heart” (Ps. 100:3-5). The Apostle Paul confirms what was said in a similar way: “Do not be deceived: evil associations corrupt good morals” (1 Cor. 15:33).

The sins of people sometimes resemble some deadly pathogenic bacteria: both of them require a beneficial habitat for their rapid development. So eliminate this environment!

6) Pray and be filled with the word of God.

It is unlikely that anyone has been able to expel darkness from space without filling it with light. Darkness goes away exactly to the extent that light comes, and our lives are no exception.

Fill your heart with the Word of God, remain in prayer, and you will begin to discover that weakness and yielding to sin will begin to be replaced by strength and firmness of spirit. The psalter contains the perfect recipe for the path to a holy life: “I have hidden Your word in my heart, so that I would not sin against You” (Ps. 119:11).

7) Finally, don't give up if you stumble.

Once Edwin Louis Cole, with whom the Lord gave me the opportunity to become acquainted at one time, said: “Champions are not those who have never lost, but those who never give up.” He was right! There is not a single skater who has never fallen; figure skating champions have fallen countless times during their training. How are they different from those who go to the skating rink on weekends, once a year, to try their hand at skating? Yes, because, unlike ordinary amateurs who do not bother with training, professional skaters go and move forward towards high goals, WITHOUT AFRAID that they will stumble.

It’s better not to fall and you should make every effort to do so, but if, for some reason, you still stumble, then the worst thing you can do is consider your fallen state to be your own destiny. Don't do that!

I will tell you that there was a period in my life when I fell and fell. It wasn't just one day or a week. All that time became for me not only a milestone of testing for me, but also for my closest people, who were ready to sympathize with me when I fell and rejoice when I rose.

Every time I fell, I had to make an effort to get up, and I can’t say that it was always easy. That period of my life helped shape me as a person...

After this there were other, no less serious tests: I had to learn to use a spoon, draw, button my clothes myself, but it was precisely in these

difficulties and defeats, those skills came that I needed so much later, in adult life...

Did you smile? That’s right, because this is not just my story, but every person’s. Everything that we achieve lies through the path of temporary defeats (of course, not intentional), but it is not they that make us winners, but the constant desire to get up and move on.

I really like the thought of the Apostle Paul, who once said: “Who are you, judging another man’s servant? Before his Lord he stands, or he falls. And he will be raised up, for God is able to raise him up” (Rom. 14:4). Do you hear? God is POWERFUL to raise him up.

So do not lose faith, hope, or love for the Lord, get up and go forward, and only in this way, you can one day write me a testimony about HOW you were able to overcome the problems of your life.

All the best to you! And victories!

How not to sin?- This is perhaps the most important question of those people who turn to an Orthodox psychologist for help. After all, it is important not only to realize that sin leads to trouble, but also to have firm intentions to renounce sin, whatever it may be. The following conversation with a Christian helps to understand the intricacies of the question of how to learn not to sin.

Andrey: When we talk about the Bible, a dictionary is not the best help. The Bible interprets itself, not people. The Bible does not say anywhere that hell, the underworld, is a place of eternal torment.

Mila: Oh... it would have been better said! Otherwise, it somehow relaxed me, I need to be afraid so as not to sin, when sin in itself is pleasant and under the guise of good.

Andrew: Fear is the worst motive in a relationship with God. Fear is Satan's weapon. The Bible says there is no fear in love.

Mila: That's it... the concept of salvation from torment and from Satan, from his power, and love - that’s what it was! How not to sin?

Andrew: Think more about Christ, about His character, love for you, about His mercy, purity, righteousness, holiness.

Mila: Yes, that’s all I think about)))

Andrey: Well done. 🙂

Mila: You see, this doesn’t stop me from doing what I was doing. I have a greater fear of being without a job than of hell. I don’t know how not to sin. And fear comes from lack of faith...

Andrew: When you read the Bible, try first of all to see God, his character. The Gospels will especially help with this. After reading it, it is impossible not to love Jesus. 🙂

Mila: I love Christ! He is the ideal of a man and a man.

Andrew: “If you love Me, keep My commandments”

Mila: the evil one is giving me thoughts that, they say, it’s okay - work as you worked, one thing doesn’t interfere with the other

Andrey: Don't be afraid. 🙂 God will never leave you. 🙂

Mila: In general, the struggle is on)

Andrew: The whole Universe is at His disposal, all gold and silver are His. 🙂 And there’s no way without a fight. We are either at peace with ourselves and the spirit of this world, but at enmity with God, or at peace with God, but at enmity with Satan.

Mila: You know... I'm not afraid of being left without money.

Mila: And unclaimed...

Andrey: Unclaimed?! 🙂 Oh! You don't know how much work God has in store for you! 🙂

Mila: You know, what general advice, how to get rid of sin?

Pray and sin if you cannot live without sin, but sooner or later sinning will become disgusting. In some moments this happened, but in terms of work... it’s not quite working out yet. I’m just afraid I won’t pay for my studies, so I’m stalling for time. But it’s clear that my husband won’t leave me because of this...

Andrew: Liberation from the slavery of sin does not happen in one day, but it must happen... Some become coarse in heart, waiting until it becomes disgusting to sin and get used to sin. “Ephraim became attached to idols. Leave him..." (c)

Mila: Thank you, you are a real healer of the soul, that’s what I’m talking about “ ABOUT! You don't know how much work God has in store for you! 🙂 »

Andrew: God is a Healer. 🙂 “We are worthless slaves. What needed to be done was done” (c)

Mila: yes, yes, I agree) all praise to the Lord)

Andrew: His Spirit comforts and encourages us. 🙂 Glory to him.

Andrey: You need to make up your mind. And you will see His wisdom and power! 🙂

Mila: I’ll decide when I’ve at least paid for my studies. Otherwise, my husband will definitely not pay for my whims in his opinion

Andrey: That is. is your husband more powerful and richer than God? 🙂

Mila: On the contrary, he has come to terms with my eternal student life, but I have no right to extract money from my family. Moral. It’s already hard for him to support us. Tell me, is Satan giving me these thoughts? Should I trust God and suddenly quit everything?

Andrey: Well, then trust in God. If you really need this study and blessing, then God will provide payment. I lived without a salary for a year and didn’t need anything. 🙂

Mila: You lived on your own.

Andrey: That is, God has enough money for me alone, but if there is more, then He already has problems with finances? 🙂 We have a problem - we don’t see a way out of the impasse. And God, by the way, also has a “problem”: He has thousands of ways out of this dead end for us, and now He decides which of these thousands to choose. 🙂

Mila: Yes, I agree :)

P.S. Without going into disputes about the existence of hell as taught by the Orthodox Church and the actual interpretation of the Bible by evangelists, it should be noted the basic rule that allows you not to sin, and it is described in Scripture.

We tend to make mistakes and stumble. We are not perfect, and neither are our actions, words and intentions. But, being believers, we can always strive for the best, for improvement and distance from sin. Thanks to the mercy of the Almighty and the light of Islam, we can gradually get rid of our sinful nature. If we do not resist sin, it will weaken our souls and distance us from Allah Almighty. About the need for self-control, Allah the Almighty said: “Whoever was afraid to appear before his Lord and restrained himself from passions, Paradise will be his refuge” (79:40-41).

Man is not perfect, but his self-control can become perfect. Sins can be avoided if you control yourself and take into account some points:

1. Know your enemy.

The most important strategy in confrontation is to know your enemy. The more you know your enemy, the easier your fight. Life is a struggle against Satan - the enemy of our souls. We must study it and know the tactics it uses to lead a person astray.

2. Strives for the help of the Almighty.

Allah helps those who strive for Him. You take a step towards Him, and He runs towards you. Allah is always there. At any time of the day we can turn to Him with a request. Ask Allah to protect you from the evil, temptations and seductions of this world and to gift your heart with iman that will not allow you to fall into sin.

3. Devote time to Allah.

Daily communication with the Almighty (memory, prayer, reading the Koran) is the main rule of self-control. A person who devotes himself and his time to Allah is protected from evil and endowed with good. Devote more time to Allah and religion, this will allow you to focus on the main things and stay firmly on the raft.

4. Avoid situations that may lead to sin.

A Muslim should be very careful to avoid sins and situations that can lead to them. Very often a person does not intend to sin, but the situation and environment in which he finds himself contributes to this. Therefore, by distancing oneself from such situations, a person protects himself from sin.

5. Know the consequences.

Sin is an obstacle that separates a person from Allah and as a result can make us a slave to our desires, thereby destroying our entire life. Many lives are ruined just because people cross the boundaries of the forbidden set by Allah. Remember that Allah has blessed us with a healthy body and a sound mind, and ingratitude for this will lead to severe punishment.

6. Remembering Allah.

Often thinking about something leads to it becoming a reality. Therefore, avoid bad thoughts that will cause temptation. Try to think about good things and fill your thoughts with the remembrance of Allah, which will bring good things into your life.

7. Urgent repentance.

If you stumble and commit a sin, then you should remember that sin does not lead a person out of religion. The mercy of Allah is greater than any sin; by repenting, we realize what has been done and ask for sincere forgiveness from the All-Forgiving and All-Merciful, expressing our humility and submission.

Can a person not sin?

Fish live in the salty sea, and they are not salted. In the world - a person, he can live and not grumble - not sin. There are people who live holy lives... But our holiness, of course, is relative. It is said: “The Lord alone is sinless” (0cr. 15:4), and we people are sinners. But sin is different. There are serious sins, there are minor ones, there are bodily, spiritual, mental... The main thing is to realize your unworthiness before God and try to live according to the commandments, not to judge anyone, not to extol yourself...

Who is more sinful - Adam or Eve? Man or woman?

You can’t put the question like that, there are men and women who are sinners, and there are also saints... For some reason, many people believe that a woman is more sinful because Eve tempted Adam to sin. We will tell women the solution... Yes, sin entered man through Eve, she gave Adam the forbidden fruit to taste. But let's figure it out: which of them sinned more? Who suffered more? Who tempted Eve? The highest angel who was at the Throne and knew many secrets from God; Although he is fallen, he is still an angel. She couldn't resist him. He seduced her: “Pluck the forbidden fruit and you will know everything, you will be like God.” And Adam listened to the weakest vessel - Eve. The husband trusted his wife and ate the fruit. Let us remember that salvation came through his wife - the Virgin Mary - the Purest Vessel, the Incontainable God was contained in Her...

Everyone is equal before God - both men and women. Before God there is neither male nor female, and in heaven all holy people will be in renewed flesh, like angels.

Why is the Lord punishing?

The Lord is the fullness of Love, He never punishes anyone. Love cannot punish. When we sin, we punish ourselves. Which way? For our sins, the grace of the Lord departs from us, and we fall into the power of demons. And we put ourselves at risk of punishment. But the Lord does not punish anyone. The word "punishment" has the following meaning. Parents give instructions to their children so that they obey and behave morally - do not smoke, do not swear, do not swear, do not drink. If a child follows the orders of his parents, then he will succeed in everything in life. And if he does not fulfill his parents’ orders, he punishes himself. He got into a fight and the police opened a case against him. Stole something - the same thing. That is, a person punishes himself.

A friend of mine has a little son who is a sleepwalker and suffers from somnambulism. What is this - demonic possession or mental illness?

When a person commits a sin, he hurts his soul and becomes mentally ill. Previously, until the 20th century, we did not have psychiatric hospitals. There were temples and monasteries for the sick at heart. When a person committed a sin, he came to church, repented, received unction, received communion and received spiritual healing. But as soon as churches and monasteries were closed, mental hospitals immediately began to open. If a child is sick, then the parents need to check their lives; This means that you need to repent of all your sins, get married, and remember everything. If the child is 10-15 years old, he needs to be confessed, he can be given unction, communion, and the parents can pray. Everything is interconnected. Not only parents, but also all neighbors, brothers, sisters must repent, get married, live in peace, and become church people. A family is a single body. One member is sick - everyone is suffering.

When people sin, they suffer not only themselves, but also nature. One day at the beginning of summer there was a hurricane. Don't you connect this event with our sins?

When people begin to blaspheme, open satanic temples, and begin to serve the devil, nature itself can no longer tolerate it. In Moscow there was such a hurricane that it tore out trees, more than forty thousand trees were damaged. This is God's warning. The people must come to God, repent, and begin to serve Him with their lives. Otherwise we could end up badly. The Lord Himself, through natural disasters, calls us to repentance and a pure life.

There was also a tornado in Ivanovo. This city is special, the city of the first Soviets, and we say - the last. Of course, it was necessary to pay for these terrible sins. After all, from here the whole infection spread throughout the country. That is why this disaster was allowed to happen. I heard the figure - ten thousand people were injured.

Through sorrows, tornadoes, and floods, the Lord calls us to repentance and correction of our lives.

How to gain patience? How to fight sin if it stings incessantly, with impunity?

It is very valuable that a person intends to fight. It happens that a person is so overwhelmed by vices and passions and they torment him so much that he begins to break the commandments of God.

Imagine: a man fell off a cliff. If he does not have time to catch on to the stone, he will fly down. Everything works in the same way in spiritual life. If a man

fell into one temptation, that is, he committed some kind of sin, he immediately needs to repent before the Lord. Otherwise, this sin, like a snowball, will attract other passions, other sins. Until I get to confession, I must ask the Lord: “God, be merciful to me, a sinner! Forgive me and have mercy! I have sinned and transgressed Your commandment! Lord, forgive and have mercy on me!” And at the first opportunity, without delaying for long, go to confession to a priest and bring repentance.

What is the value of confession? When we come and repent, complain to God about the devil who has tempted us and attacks us, the Lord forbids him to lead us into temptation. The Lord knows: what we did not see in ourselves before, we found, discovered the vice in our soul, repented of sin, confessed to Him, and He, in His great mercy, forgives us our uncleanness, our sin and gives us grace-filled strength to fight it sin.

Patience is our first assistant in the fight against passions. The first time it is difficult for a person to gather his courage and give up his intention to sin. After repentance, he may fall again, and then he needs to repent again. And so on until the time comes and the person completely gets rid of this passion. In times of fall, prayer and heartfelt contrition are especially important.

The great Russian writer F.M. Dostoevsky was deeply devoted to Orthodoxy. However, he had a weakness - a passion for playing roulette. He traveled abroad and played there. I couldn't get rid of this passion. But one morning I woke up and felt completely disgusted with the game. The Lord had mercy on him and freed his soul from the destructive passion of gambling. Why? Because he constantly repented of his weakness.

We need to learn to tolerate ourselves, without despondency, without despair, and constantly work on ourselves: “Good deeds and work will crush everything in life.”

A person in confession constantly repents of the same sins. He hates sins, fights and still repeats them. What else can you do to defeat them?

The most important thing is for a person to hate sin. This is the very center! If we do not love sin, then we will quickly get rid of it.

The Lord blessed us with many gifts, for example, he gave us the gift of anger. Do you hear? Gift! So that we are angry against the devil, against evil spirits, so that we stand strong in their attacks. But we have perverted this gift: we sin, we become angry against our neighbor. We have been given the gift of zeal for God. But we are not jealous of holiness, but of our neighbor. This is a sin. We have been given greed as a gift of thirst for God, for everything holy, and we are greedy for earthly delights. We need to correct ourselves and, most importantly, hate sin.

And this requires determination. In his youth, Blessed Augustine could not get rid of one sin, and only when he became a mature spiritual man did he understand why sin did not leave him. He lacked determination, a sincere desire to free himself: “I prayed, asked to be delivered from sin, but in the depths of my soul I seemed to say: “Deliver me, Lord, from sin, but not now, later. Now I’m young, I want to live.” I didn’t say these words out loud, but somewhere in my mind this thought was there.”

I am ashamed to utter some of my sins before the priest. I can only cry out daily: “Lord, forgive me, the accursed one.” Will He take away from me those sins that I name before Him?

Of course, we must constantly repent before God and ask for forgiveness. But we don’t know whether He has forgiven us or not. The Lord left us the clergy on earth, gave the first Church - His disciples-apostles - the power to forgive and bind sins. The sacrament of confession comes from the apostles.

On the Day of the Last Judgment, the Lord will forgive us all sins, except unrepentant ones. You need to cast aside shame and confess your sins to the priest. Our bad deeds are burned with shame. We should be ashamed to sin, but not ashamed to repent. If you are sick and cannot go to church, invite the priest home. We do not know when our hour of death will come; we must be ready to meet it at every minute. We must repent boldly. Here we name our sins only in the presence of a priest - one person. And at the Last Judgment, unrepentant sins of which we are ashamed will be heard before all the saints, before the Angels. The whole world will recognize them. That’s why the devil tells us to be ashamed of them so that we don’t repent. While the blood is still flowing in the body, while the heart is beating, while the mercy of the Lord remains with us, we must confess unrepentant sins.

Why are we embarrassed to name a shameful sin? Our pride and pride get in the way: “What will Father think of us?” Yes, the priest has a stream of people with the same sins every day! And he will think: “Here is another lost sheep of Christ who has returned to God’s flock.”

When a person freely speaks of his sins, does not make amends for them, laments, cries, the priest experiences great respect for the repentant. He appreciates the sincerity of the penitent.

Sins do not need to be stored in the soul, as in a piggy bank. Who needs them? When repentance is real, it is easy for both the person and the priest. And “there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents” (Luke 15:7). If we went to see a doctor and were told about minor minor illnesses, but the most life-threatening wound was hidden, we could die; spiritual wounds are no less dangerous for our spiritual life, our soul, and the soul is more valuable than the body.

If we previously hid shameful sins, deliberately kept silent, then all our previous confessions are considered invalid, the sacrament was not performed. All sins, named and unnamed, remained in the soul, and even more serious sin was added - concealing sins in confession. This is stated in the breviary: “Behold, child, Christ stands invisibly, accepting your confession; if you conceal any sin, you will have a grave sin.” You can deceive a priest, but you cannot deceive God. And if after such “confessions” you also take communion, then communion will be a condemnation. There will be special punishment for this at the Last Judgment.

Peace to you, dear visitors of the Orthodox website “Family and Faith”!

What to do if a person has sins that he is aware of, but cannot stop doing them? If such a person goes to Confession, then wouldn’t it be hypocrisy: to repent of sins, knowing that he will continue to sin the same way again?

Archpriest Alexander Lebedev answers:

“Confession is often compared to treatment. This is a really good comparison. When do we turn to a doctor for help? When the illness has already passed, or when we feel that we cannot recover from it?

In the first case, going to the doctor is pointless, but the second case is just ours. It is then that we need to go, run to Confession, when we understand that on our own we cannot do anything about our sins. And there is no hypocrisy in the fact that a person admits this.

By and large, no one can give a guarantee of non-repetition of any of our sins, because this has happened in life - you commit an action, admit a thought, experience a feeling that you did not expect from yourself. So how can we be sure that we will not repeat this or that sin? And are all our confessions now really hypocritical? Of course not.

In confession, what is important is a person’s attitude towards sin - recognizing it as shameful and dirty. It is also important that a person’s intention is to fight this sin, no matter what, even the lack of strength.

If both are in the heart, Confession is real. After all, the main thing in the fight against sin is to get involved in a battle, even a hopeless one, because it is better to be defeated in battle than to give up without the slightest resistance.

The feeling of our own powerlessness in the face of sins teaches us the correct attitude towards Confession, as a means of helping in overcoming this powerlessness.

After all, Confession is not a monologue, Confession is a Sacrament, which means, in addition to the internal experiences of a person, prayers and external actions of the priest, it also contains the action of God.

The effect is not only cleansing, but also strengthening. The hope that, with God's help, and only with her, it is possible (sooner or later - that's another question) to overcome sins, motivates a person to go to Confession, even if he assumes that he will not be able to leave his sin.

So, you need to repent of both your sins and your powerlessness, and after Confession you need to fight your sins, at least for a minute, an hour, two, a day to live without them, and if you fall, then not without a fight. And then repent again. And so all my life.”

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Have a good and blessed day, Father! There was one event in my life when I was young. When my friend and I were about 14 years old, we did the following thing: we called a family’s landline phone, remained silent and hung up. The fact was that one of us was in love with a man who was married. Back then, in my youth, this was not fully realized. Of course, as the years passed, the sin was realized, Repentance was brought, General Confession was brought, churching was gradual... But one question torments me: what if that woman cursed? After all, we brought her to the point where her blood pressure rose... This woman was the mother-in-law of that man. I don’t know for sure (that she cursed), maybe she didn’t want anything like that in our address, and in mine, in particular... but the fact is that I can’t start a family, I’m 36 years old, I don’t have a husband, I’ve never gotten pregnant, I don’t experience a lack of attention, but it didn’t get serious! Now I’ve been completely alone for a long time... and now, starting to analyze my whole life, I remember this incident (although I confessed to it and repented!!), then there was an incident that my own grandmother also said unpleasant and offensive words to me ( I also recently repented of this offense at Confession!!)... but the fact is that nothing in my life changes on a personal level... Father, please judge, advise what I’m doing wrong, what should I do, I’m praying , but the hope for starting a family is fading... A disabled child was born into my brother’s family a long time ago, it turns out that there will be no continuation of the family.... One church-going girl told me that it’s clear from everything that the Lord does not want procreation, that’s why I decided to consult with you, what was my mistake and what should I correct so that the Lord would have mercy? Save me, God!

Answer

1. Hello, Elena!
   It is a sin to suspect and slander a person who may not have wished you anything bad. And it’s a sin to think bad about a person, even if he did something - God is his Judge, not us. You have repented, and now you need to look not at others, but at yourself, at your sins and passions. What kind of prayer is this without hope, with despondency, this is impossible. It is necessary to pray and ask God with faith in His providence. The Lord knows what is good for us, and the Lord desires the salvation of every person.
   God help you!

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I ask for an answer from Father. I am 45 years old, married, and have a child. Almost a year ago, I accidentally found out that my husband was corresponding with another woman. When I asked what we should do now, my husband said that we need to get a divorce. At first she cried, accused, begged, threatened, but always came across her husband’s stony behavior. Then it occurred to me that he had been bewitched. I started looking on the Internet for information about hexes, love spells, and bindings. All the “symptoms” coincided. I myself began to read “unties from homewreckers”, “conspiracies to save marriage”, “husband’s bonds”, burned candles, etc. (however, I didn’t do any “black love spells” or anything from “black magic”, I chose only “white magic”, without bad words; of course, now I understand that there are no types of magic - everything is sinful; but at that moment, in confusion and the desire to fix everything, I could not stop). I turned to a woman who read prayers over me and a photo of my husband, went to her, spent a lot of money. I started calling different psychics from different sites, also for a fee, so that they could tell me what really happened. All attempts to find out from my husband how serious this was with him did not lead to results - he said that he would not talk about it. I cried in the car on the way to work, asking, Lord, why am I doing this? And the answer came, as it happens, in a sermon accidentally heard by Father Vladimir Golovin. I realized what I had done in our family life: pride, self-centeredness, unwillingness to make concessions, excessive touchiness and much more. I began to listen to the sermons of Father Vladimir, Father Andrei Tkachev all the time, and only now began to learn to be a wife according to Orthodox canons. I began to pray by agreement with the akathist to Guria, Samon and Aviva, and read the akathist to St. Nicholas for 40 days in a row (I took the blessing from the priest). Our spiritual father died recently, and now I am restless, and there is no one to ask, how can I continue to live? Through prayer, the Lord once again had mercy on me, the accursed one—things began to improve with my husband. True, I don’t know if my husband continues to communicate with this woman... and that’s why I still often call psychics and fortune tellers in nervous hysteria... And I can’t come to confession, because I know that I’ll call again when I feel like , that the husband is late not at work, not in the gym, but because with her... I tormented myself, I can’t get rid of suspicions and mistrust, and I love my husband very much, and I pray and thank the Lord for the mercy that we are together... and I can not stop. I know that I need to ask my priest for penance and atone for my sin along with all the others. Help, for Christ's sake! Tell me how to get rid of this scourge and come to repentance?!

Answer

1. Hello Maria!
   No one will do this for you. Only you yourself, if, of course, you sincerely want God to be with you. We can pray, we can go to church, and even take communion, but if we have little faith and immediately turn to the demon, then the person is left alone without God. It would be even more correct to say that more than one, the devil will always come to the place of the bright angel. One person does not remain. The Lord said you cannot serve God and the devil. Either you will leave one, or you will please only one. This will not continue forever. Either to God or to the devil. Through the sin of idolatry, the devil will destroy the soul.
   Lack of faith from little knowledge, maybe you simply don’t know that God is the Creator of everything, God is the only Savior of the world. If you understand this even just a little, your next step is urgent confession.
   With God blessing!

   Answer

Thank you very much for this article! Otherwise, the Lord sent me to your site! Now I keep fasting and try to live according to God’s laws to the best of my ability! But I didn’t know whether to go to confession if I wasn’t sure that I could continue to not commit one sin! Wouldn't this be hypocrisy? And now I think that the Lord will accept my repentance and strengthen me on the righteous path. And maybe I will overcome my sin! I will definitely go to confession and communion and ask for God’s help! Thanks again! God bless you!

Answer

1. Elena, good afternoon!
   We wish you God's help in the only correct decision - to go to confession, repent and ask for strengthening from the Lord God in the uniqueness of this sin.
   What if you manage to commit this sin again, go again and repent again. Even many righteous people fell sinfully (more than once), but immediately, without delay, went to Confession.
   God help you!

   Answer

Indeed, as sad as it is to realize this, in confession we often repeat the same sins we have committed. The main thing is to REALIZE that we are powerless to change ourselves without GOD'S HELP! The main thing is to entrust your own will to the WILL of Christ Jesus (for only He knows what the corruptible BODY is, in which we put on after the fall of Eve and Adam. Only JESUS ​​knows all the severity and torment of bodily and mental suffering. Only Jesus was infallible and HOLY at his life). We have no right to call anyone living on earth a saint! We are simple people. We are the flock of Christ. He is the Chief Shepherd (the LEADING LEADER of our lives with His Most Holy Father and the Holy Spirit). He knows when to allow someone to do something - to endure penance. And when to cure whom - what happens as a result of spiritual growth.

Confession is not only a list of things you have done that are contrary to God. THIS IS also AWARENESS of one’s infancy (if this is a person beginning his ascent to a state of peace in the soul) (we remember how the Lord gave HIS PEACE to the apostles, who were worthy to have the GIFT OF THE HOLY SPIRIT and to pass it on to other people pleasing to God.

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